Concord and Conception

Related image

10th Astrea – Columbadi

Just wanted to make a quick post to apologise for lack of posts recently. Most of my religious blogging comes in quick, short bursts on Tumblr or through chatting on various Discord servers. I haven’t had the inspiration in a while to make a long-winded post discussing various beliefs.

I will say however how touched I am by those who have been in touch recently who found Déanism via this blog and wished to learn more. It’s always enriching to see more and more people embracing Our Mother into their hearts. I know there is some panic on various sites at the moment, in particularly Tumblr, due to certain rule changes and people worrying if people are going to disappear onto different sites. For the record; I don’t plan on going anywhere, either here or Tumblr or Discord.

Again, if anyone is interested in chatting to other Déanists and Filianists, please feel free to contact me and I can share a link with you. The reason we don’t publish invite links openly is to avoid trolls and we also like to make sure someone wanting an invite understands fully what Déanism is and the sort of environment you’re coming into:

  • The Ekklesia ‘Concord’ server is strictly for people over 16 years of age.
  • You must be a Déanist or interested in becoming one in order to enter. Déanism is simply the belief and devotion to a transcendent and exclusively feminine God. One can technically be a Déanist and believe there are male ‘gods’ or spirits who exist beneath Her as expressions of Her, but never equal to Her.
  • We ask that someone has a basic knowledge of Déanism and MDF (Madrian-Filianic-Déanic) religions before entering, more so that they don’t find themselves completely lost by the words thrown around by those of us who have been there a while. I advise people to take a quick read of The Clear Recital (ECE 3rd edition at the moment) as well as the Chapel of Mother God or The Kore Di-Jana Ekklesia site. After that, we are welcome to answer any further questions newcomers have.
  • You do NOT need to be a Filianist to join. We are, undoubtedly, an MDF leaning community for the most part; which includes many traditions stemming from Madrian teachings. We are also open to other non-MDF religions so long as they believe that God the Mother is the Sole Creatrix, without a male consort or father god equal to Her (those that believe in male gods who are lesser emanations of Déa are welcome).
  • We are a Thamëlic community, meaning we try our best to treat each other with kindness, consideration and to keep a harmonious server. Debates and discussions are allowed so long as it doesn’t descend into name-calling or insults on any side. If it seems a debate is upsetting people, even without intent, we kindly ask it to stop and to be taken into private messages if need be. We’re not perfect and haven’t been without our fair share of drama in the year we’ve been active – but we are trying our best to learn and improve.
  • Adding on that last point; this is first and foremost a place for like-minded maids to gather and share their love of Mother God and (for most) Our Lady, Her Daughter. It is not an online church, as such, but is considered – at least by myself – a second home for some of us. We are all of different shape, size, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, backgrounds and traditions. All are Déa’s children. So come in, make yourself comfy and relax. 🙂

In other news; we are now into Astrea and the advent of Our Lady’s upcoming birth. I don’t have the space for a Sun Wheel but I have placed a purple candle on my shrine in honour of Kyria Zoe Anna’s royalty. Either today or tomorrow, according to differing sources, is the Feast of Conception; a date not recognised on the Janite calendar. This is when, scripture tells us, Our Mother Mari brooded upon the waters after maidkind had turned from Her, and conceived within Herself the Most Holy Daughter:

And She stood in contemplation upon the waters of the first darkness; like a great Dove upon the waters She brooded. And She became absorbed within Her and communed with Her own Self; and Her light ceased to shine forth from Her, and yet Her light grew greater. And She fell to Her knees. And the surface of the waters became turbulent, and the great waves curled over Her, and their white foam could not be seen in all that darkness.

And when the waters became calm again, the Mistress of All Things rose to Her feet. For She had conceived a Daughter that was not separate from Her, but one with Her, and the Child of Her Light.

– Mythos of the Divine Maid 1:3-7

I know some will argue, even in the case of a divine being, how the Daughter can be born without a father. Firstly, if one really wished to have a comparison to material creation, one can look to parthenogenesis; that of asexual reproduction without the need for fertilisation or a co-parent. The comparison is very apt, as the Daughter is in many ways a ‘clone’ of the Mother, created so that She can explore the realms which the Mother Herself cannot since creation could no longer look upon Her. Our Lady, Zoe Anna, is the culmination of Perfect Love gathered within the Mother’s womb and then brought forth for all the world to know. Secondly; She’s God!

Indeed, this scene of the Conception is one of the most fascinating mysteries in the Mythos. Why does Our Mother choose to brood over the waters? Why do they become so turbulent around Her? Water is a recurring theme in the scriptures. In the Creation, the first daughter created in the image of the Mother rose up from the waters. The Snake then attempts to call to the waters, while the first daughter rests, in order to flood the earth and destroy the Mother’s creation. Mari then throws the waters into the sky before they can do the Snake’s bidding and creates the first rain. There is also a chapter in the First Book of Teachings, the Heart of Water, which celebrates the serenity and strength of a fluid, compassionate heart over a hard, icy one. Water seems to be a rather ambiguous but beautiful force according to the Recital. To me the water seems symbolic of all the forces of the Universe, both order and chaos, beautiful yet terrifying. To imagine all the powers of this Universe, both material and supernal, colliding together in fear around the Conception, only to be stilled in peaceful submission when the ritual is complete, is a rather incredible image and a sign of Our Lady’s influence on the world before She’s even been ‘born’.

If I don’t manage to make another post before the end of the month, I pray everyone has a most Blessed Adoria / Nativity and wish good will to all Maids.

Blessed is the Most Holy Mother and Child,

Blessed is She.


Dancing with the Dark Lady

Related image

16th of Abolan – Themadi

We are but hours away from Matralia: the Feast of Divine Life (also called Cuivanya). For Janites, this second of the three Harvest feasts is a time for honouring the Trinity and, specifically, the Dark Mother. Because, in truth, the Dark Mother is both one aspect of the Trinity yet at the same time to the sum of the other two parts. She is the eternal Source and formless energy from which all things, both rarefied and corporeal, are born. While the Bright Mother is the active Creatrix, like a parent post-birth giving constant nurture and support to her offspring, the Dark Mother is as a pregnant woman, eternally cradling the cosmos and all other realms in Her womb. The reaping of the harvest also reminds us of all living beings unavoidable fate; death and the doorway to new life.

The Janite tradition contains (or rather used to contain) a sub-group of priestesses known as the Iremian Order. The following quote is a brief description from one of their old posts explaining the duties of an Iremian priestess:

“Priestesses of Iremia. Iremia is Greek for stillness. In the Janite Faith, this word means the Still Centre of Being, which is represented by the center of the Fora. An Iremian priestess is a contemplative priestess. She may or may not serve a formal liturgy nor have a formal form of worship. She tends towards a self-expressed form of worship and ritual with the exception of the Communion Rite, which must not be changed.

The Iremian priestesses are the Hands and (Veiled) Face of the Great Mother because as the Great Mother resides in the Still Centre of Being, the Iremian priestess resides in stillness and quiet contemplation. She may or may not serve the Faith Community in other ways, as well.”

Being dedicated in particular to the Dark Mother aspect of Déa, the matron Jana for the Iremian Order is Agyia Rhea. In some sects of Filianism, devotees are advised against working closely with Agyia Rhea / Sai Rhave, particularly Westerners. I don’t think this is to say anything negative against Agyia Rhea Herself, more so the misconception about who She is and what Her purpose is. Much the same misunderstanding tends to occur, especially with those new to Filianism, in first hearing about the Dark Mother.

The Western world in particular has been conditioned to associate Darkness with evil. The colour black, complete silence and symbols of death often invoke fear and dread, some of which is only natural, while others are definitely brought about through nurture rather than nature. We can tell this by observing how other cultures may treat the subject of death or view certain symbols as holy where we have been told they invoke bad luck or demons. And when you do sometimes have a person who is drawn to the ‘dark’ from this Western view, it seems to be commonly driven by a need for rebellion, to seek the morbid and macabre as a form of catharsis. I know, I was once an ‘Emo’, back in my teens, coming into witchcraft firstly out of a desire to have a weapon to use against the rest of the world, and being drawn to the image of ‘dark gods/goddesses’ as a way of channelling my anger, rather than bothering to do any real research on them and simply attracted to the terrifying aesthetic.

But much like many deities of the world mistaken for evil or demonic (Hekate, Kali, Hades, Lucifer etc), the Dark Mother, and by association Agyia Rhea, is mistaken to be wicked or evil, when She is everything but. Nor is She chaotic or ‘destructive’ as we think of the word. She is not angry or domineering. She is the exact opposite; She is Stillness, the escape from the traps of ego. As the Clew of the Horse describes, Heaven is the central immovable point, while the World is the ever revolving rim around Her. In fairness, Filianism itself might hold its hands up to some of the confusion, as the villain of our Mythos – Irkalla – is given the title; the Dark Queen. There are also instances in the Recital where darkness is used in a negative, warning context. This may simply be a result of Déa’s revelation communicating with us in how She knows our khear-riven minds understand, as is with many a scripture. Many at first assume the Dark Mother and the Dark Queen are one in the same and it’s plain to see why. But Irkalla, or the Fallen Queen as I often call her, desired death of Love itself, and to revel in the grief and sorrow Our Lady’s demise would bring about. The Dark Mother, however, is Life. And with that; Light and Love are Her descendants.

Now, She has been compared to Shiva, the Destroyer aspect of the Brahman trinity, but again we have been conditioned to hear the word ‘destroy’ and see images of explosions, executions and a blood-thirsty apocalypse. We forget that destruction is simply the end; a destination. Any violence that takes place before is part of the journey itself, not the conclusion. I’ve witnessed death in person, of someone I loved, twice so far. Both were pets; one was my cat who was hit by a car and died in my arms before I could get him to a vet (it probably wouldn’t have saved him but he may have had some pain relief if nothing else). The other was putting my dog to sleep after we discovered she had a tumour in her chest. One death was violent and painful. The other was quick and peaceful. Both led to the same result. All of us and everything in this universe is heading for that same end, when we shed the bodies of matter and return back to one with the Dark Mother – whether the events leading up to that are serene or chaotic is not due to Her but to the khear of existence. Déa, in any of Her forms, would never desire pain upon Her children. The Dark Mother is no different. Dying may or may not be a terrible experience, but Death itself is merely letting go and collapsing back into the arms of She Who Is, until we are born again.

In Filianism, we do not have images depicting the Dark Mother (if they are, they normally depict Her as abstract or an incomplete picture). When an Iremian devotee calls upon Her, they follow it with; “I Shield My Eyes” as none can see Her. Her title of ‘Dark’ is not due to any connection to evil, but to the Unknown. The Bright Mother illuminates the cosmos and gives form to all, and so She Herself has many forms, as does the Daughter. But the Dark Mother is She before and beyond all form, but that does mean She is alien to us, or that we cannot know Her love. Just as an unborn child cannot see her mother from inside the womb, she is still ever aware of her warmth, her being, sometimes even her voice – though the baby cannot understand her words, she might still be comforted by the soft, loving words and song.

And what of Agyia Rhea?

Well, for the past year, since my conversion to the Déanic faith, I’ve been attempting to connect with the Janati and try to live by the example of their virtues. I try my best to summon each one in my heart when I feel I’m in need of their strength and guidance. I wasn’t sure if I would find a matron Jana who I connected to most. Of all the ones I expected to be drawn to, Agyia Rhea was the one I least suspected. Yet, I found myself calling upon her more so than the other six, a few months passing by before I realised I was doing so. I’ve suffered with anxiety ever since I was a young teen, maybe even before. A lot of it stemmed from school bullying and pressure from my teachers (I was one of those “she is gifted but doesn’t try hard enough” students). Many times my mother would drive me to the school gates and I would start vomiting, only to feel fine as soon as she got me home and I knew I didn’t have to go in. I’ve improved a lot since then, I’m able to be out in public and even become a manager at my job, yet it’s still deeply affected me and I’m terrible at making friends or talking to people outside of work.

But I’ve made peace with that and who I am. Not saying I don’t still seek improvement but I’m no longer hating myself for not being the extrovert the world desires. I’m happy being a modern hermit. I’m happy with my limited human interactions and online, distant but warm relationships. I love my dogs and I love nothing more than walking with them over the fields and woods. I’m content to live a small, humble and quiet life. However, this desire for peace and quiet does often lead to impatience and frustration when I do have to interact with people at work or the odd social gathering. While I try my best to be sensitive and compassionate, I am sometimes prone to spite and not thinking before saying something bitter or aggressive.

Lately, who should appear to rescue me in those moments, but Agyia Rhea? I barely need to call upon her, if not subconsciously, for her to appear when I’m at a moment where my irateness is about to get the better of me. It’s like she suddenly pops up behind me and puts her arms around me, one hand over my mouth, while the other takes my hand. And she holds me still. I feel the tightness of her grip and remember to stop. That extra second is all the difference for me to wait and rethink my actions. Or oftentimes, take no action as the best action.

When I meditate, she comes to me, and the image she takes is one I’ve not been able to shake. Like the picture above, she takes the form of part-woman, part-tree. Worth noting I hadn’t seen that picture before today, I merely did a google search on ‘tree lady’ and found an image which most matched what I saw in my mind’s eye. It’s a good likeness, but she’s taller, her bark more of a black walnut. Her arms and hands are branches, almost like claws, but not sharp, just incredibly firm. And despite being literally rooted to the earth, she is capable of being anywhere, as she exists within all the earth (also worth noting she is said to be close to Agyia Thema). Her face is indeed stern, but never cold. She never says a word, yet I can understand all she means to tell me through her eyes and movements. She rarely smiles but, when she does, it’s so small you would barely notice – but it’s a smile of love and pride.

The reason I bring up the misconceptions about ‘dark’ deities and the Dark Mother before this is because I’ve seen some Filianists write about how Agyia Rhea is a harsh disciplinarian or a cold executioner. The Chapel website advises against her worship as “an unbalanced-rhavic cult of darkness has entered the Western patriarchal psyche over the last century.” I think this does Agyia Rhea a great injustice, similar to how the unbalanced Vikhelic principle has sadly put Agyia Niké in a bad light. Are either of them to blame for how humanity has misunderstood their values and abused their gifts? Isn’t it possible for any of the Janati principles to become unbalanced?

I can’t claim to know the ‘true’ Agyia Rhea moreso than anyone else. All I can testify to is the character of the Holy Jana I keep meeting and enjoy having these moments with. Yes, her lessons can be harsh, but that is due to the reality of this existence and not her personally. She is not the cruel mistress holding the whip, she is the wise sage helping me to accept something has gone wrong and the important thing is how I will deal with it and what lessons will I learn. It’s a mistake to think that the Janati are limited by their core virtues and nothing more. They are all part of Déa and One in Her. Agyia Theia is not pure joy without a serene mind. Agyia Niké is not valour without compassion. And Agyia Rhea is not restriction without also being loving, wise and, yes, even funny. Her humour is dry and quiet but it’s there, in the glint of her eye.

What draws she and I together is our love for the silence and the stillness. To visualise myself leaning against her hard but solid body, her wooden hands upon me, I feel myself connecting to the universe through her roots. She is also my anchor, not just to the reality of the world, but more importantly; to Déa. No matter how turbulent the situation or scattered my mind, I only need call on her to end the storm and take refuge. She helps me find comfort and illumination in that which I used to fear. In that blessed stillness, I’m able to confront feelings of grief, anger, fear and revulsion without giving into them, but learning to understand them. My lady does not force these lessons upon me, but encourages me and gifts me with the space and time to take it in, while keeping me safe and secure.

Sadly there are currently no ordained priestesses in charge of the Janite tradition, so becoming a priestess of the Iremian Order may not be likely at the moment. But I still plan to serve as a devotee of this particular path through what little I know of it, mostly described in this post:

Scriptures for the Iremian Order

Also, from what I’ve seen implied, being an Iremian devotee does not mean becoming strictly monastic, nor does it mean not continuing to invoke the other Janati in day-to-day life, or no longer worshipping the Bright Mother and Holy Daughter. I am as dedicated to those other aspects of Déa as I’ve ever been, forever a daughter of the Bright Mother and disciple of Our Lady. I merely find myself drawn to Agyia Rhea. Or rather, she finds me more than I have to seek her.

Glory to the Dark Lady, Divine Stream of Mysteria,
Glory to She, Stern Princess of the Night,
May the Pillar of Truth remain fixed in Her foundations,
And may all find peace in her gentle shadow.
Blessed is the Holy Jana, Agyia Rhea,
Blessed is She.

 Related image
image source: Laura Sheridan

The Sophian Gospel of Mary Magdalene

Image result for magdalene

13th of Ceres – Sunnadi

The Feast of St. Mary Magdalene is held today, on July 22nd of the Gregorian Calendar. As I’ve mentioned before, the Magdalene is my patron Hera (Saint) and my favourite avatar of the Holy Daughter. It was She who lead me to the Divine Sophia in Gnostic Christianity which would eventually lead me to embracing Déa as a Sophian Filianist. The Magdalene has always been this hidden flame of the Church, burning bright and passionate, but kept secret or guarded. There are more legends, myths and theories surrounding who she was and what she meant to the birth of Christianity than probably any other disciple. While I no longer look to the Bible or Christian doctrine, I still deeply honour and respect Yeshua the Rabbi and his Apostle to the Apostles; the Magdalene.

One of the many modern day Gnostic Christian groups, the Ecclesia Pistis Sophia, also call themselves the Tradition of the Holy Bride. They honour Mary Magdalene as Yeshua’s wife but also his co-preacher and co-redeemer. She represents Christ-the-Sophia while he represents Christ-the-Logos, the two complementary masculine and feminine aspects of divinity. This group claims to carry knowledge of an oral tradition dating back thousands of years which records this secret life of the Magdalene which became lost to the exoteric church for one reason or another. In recent years, their current leader decided to publish this secret ‘gospel’ of Mary Magdalene which can be purchased in full (not to be confused with the ‘Gospel of Mary’ discovered in Nag Hammadi). I have my own thoughts on the book as whole, including a few criticisms and scepticism, but I won’t share those here as I wish to highlight that which I feel is positively linked to Sophian Filianism. In honour of her feast day, I decided to share some verses from this text which I feel speak on a Filianic level.

The ‘sayings’ of Mary Magdalene, supposedly recorded by her chief disciple Salome, can also be read in full on the groups website here.

1. These are sayings, spoken by Salome the Maiden in the name of St. Mary Magdalene, which women of wisdom have held in trust. Mary said, “If you know the Woman of Light, you will know your Mother and be reborn of the Mother Spirit as a child of light. Because the light is bornless, you will have eternal life.”

In Filianism, Our Celestial Mother represents Light, while the Dark Mother – the Absolute Mysteria – represents Life.

6. Mary said, “What is cast down shall be lifted up, and what is lifted up shall be thrown down; what is on high must be brought down upon the earth, and the earth must be lifted on high.”

I instantly saw a parallel with a verse from the Temple of the Heart: “To be raised up is to be cast down, but to be cast down is to be raised up. For I was cast down into the very depths; and even as the tears of My Mother’s sorrow raised Me up from death, so shall the tears of My suffering deliver you.” 

26. A woman said to Mary, “You are the holiness of womanhood we have been waiting to see.” Mary said to her, “What have you been doing while you were waiting? If you see this in me, then it is in you. All the while it has been with you! What were you waiting for?”

The Recital tells us that Our Lady is every priestess and every mother, each princess and each lady of the Earth. Nothing holy can be achieved of Maids alone, but if we find the spark of the Holy Daughter within us, then we can be Messengers of Her Light.

27. A young lady said to Mary, “When will the world be transformed?” Mary said, “It will not be transformed, but it is sacred to the Mother already. When you are transformed the world will be transformed, for you are the world and the world is you. The world is changing all of the time, and yet it is unchanged. The Mother is changing continually, yet she is ever the same, yesterday, today and tomorrow. Become as the Mother and you will see the Great Transformation, yet nothing will have changed.”

Again, compare to the Secret of the World, when we are told to change what is within us and that will change the world. It also speaks of how Déa is constantly changing and moving. Yet, as the Dark Mother, She is the still and steady centre of Heaven.

37. Mary said, “The Divine Mother is light and she is darkness, she is the saint and she is the sinner, angels and demons are images in her, as are the gods and all of the archons; yet she is beyond all of these. Know her in all things and you will be free of bondage, even as the Anointed is free.”

Déa is the eternal matrix of all things. Our Mother created all things good and, through Her Daughter, She conquered that too which is dark and lost in khear. No place is beyond Her reign and no one is ever truly without Her.

41. Mary said, “I was with the Risen Savior, and beheld the Mother. In the first heaven, she was the Radiant Earth of Paradise. In the second heaven, she was the Starry Night Sky. In the third heaven, she was a Great Fire. In the fourth heaven, she was the Great Angel and Celestial Temple, and the Holy Sacrifice. When I beheld her in the fifth heaven, she was the Glory of the Anointed abiding there, and in the sixth heaven, she was Fire and Ice and the End-Of-Days. In the seventh heaven, she was the Great Luminous Assembly, and the Holy Throne, and image of the One-Who-Sits-Upon-The-Throne; but in the Supernal Abode I cannot say what she was like. One must look and see for oneself.”

This verse is one of my favourites, as it conjures images of the Seven Janati. The final station also speaks of the Dark Mother who has no image and cannot be described. The Magdalene ascending through the Heavens closer and closer to Déa parallels the ascent of the Holy Daughter after Her sacrifice.

56. Mary said, “Until you know the darkness of Sophia, you will not acquire her light. Unless you die and are reborn of the Mother Spirit, the knowledge of the resurrection will elude you.”

“For every human soul began in Good, yet she is riven through with khear. Except she die and be reborn in Spirit, her fairest rose shall have a canker, her sweetest wine shall turn to vinegar.” – The Light, v. 20-21. I feel this one is just uncanny.

64. Mary said, “If you desire something, ask the Mother, for she gives to her children all that they desire.”

Both Filianists and Gnostics will appreciate the hidden meaning of this verse. It does not mean that we can ask for material possessions which we desire, but what we desire in terms of the gifts of the Spirit, which is Our Mother. She always provides for Her children in what we truly need.

66. Mary said, “Do not mistake the rites performed outwardly for the true sacred rite, for unless the sacred rites transpire inwardly, the outward rites are only husks of darkness.”

Our Lady tells us in the the book of The Light that we are not to judge the actions of other Maids, as we can only see the outward part which does not always reflect the inward meaning, which is what matters most.

84. Mary said, “Did God give birth to creation without a womb? No, indeed! For creation is in God’s womb, and until it is complete it shall not emerge.”

No comment needed.

92. Mary said, “Weave for yourselves garments of light, so that when you go before the Queen of Heaven to be received you do not appear naked. With faith and the fullness of knowledge, do good works and love one another, and in the Spirit of [God] you will have garments of light.”

This closely matches the message contained within the Recital which tells us many times to do the same; to do good and love one another, to have faith and knowledge of Déa, so that we may overcome khear and approach Our Mother again. Also compare; “Speak words of love and innocence, of mildness and of hope, and you shall weave a raiment of peace about your soul, and a veil of gentle light.” – Thoughts of the Mind, v. 22.

111. Mary said, “There is wisdom and there is wisdom, and the wisdom of the world is not the Wisdom of God. Seek, therefore, the truth of wisdom, that knowing the Wisdom of God all wisdom might be redeemed in you.”

Our Lady tells us to not be wise in the wisdom of the world, but in the wisdom of Déa (Sophia). “The wisdom of the world is good for the world, but what when the world shall pass away?” – Thoughts of the Mind. v. 31.

116. Mary said, “God the Father entered in through the image of the Son, but the world was overwhelmed by the great supernal glory. Therefore, the Son imparted the Mother Spirit and God the Mother has entered in through the image of the Daughter to nurture the little ones until they grow wise. The light entered but was too bright, and so now the fire comes to purify so that all might be sanctified to receive the True Light. Everything shall be accomplished in due season, and it is the Mother Spirit that will accomplish everything.”

While Filianism does not acknowledge God the Father or Son (although ‘His’ potential existence as part of Déa is often discussed), this speaks to me of how the appearance of God as primarily masculine has failed much of the world, in particular those of us who seek the Mother and Daughter. If there is a Divine Son, which Yeshua may or may not have been an avatar of, then I can see him helping to invoke the Mother Spirit into the world to heal and encouraging the Daughter to arise so that we may be saved. The Recital also speaks of a time of fire, in the Words of Aletheia, which is a warning of the End-of-Days but also as a prophecy on the world being transformed and the fire being a ‘cleanse’ which will purify the world to be born anew, with us being kept protected by Our Mother throughout.

169. Mary said, “If you have all knowledge, but lack love, then you lack knowledge altogether.”

Our Lady tells us in the Crystal Tablet and other books that Love is the key to our salvation; Love of Self, Love of Maids and Love of Déa.

194. Mary said, “In the day of the coming of the Anointed many shall look and see, and among them many will be unwilling to enter the Light, for they shall not recognize the Light in the Daughter sent among them.”

“And that the world laugh at you, count it an honour; that they scorn you, count it a blessing. For yours is the higher wisdom, and in the inmost centre of their hearts, the
profane also know it to be true. Within their laughter lies fear of chastity; within their scorn of meekness and indifference to possessions lies a true terror. For those who
shelter in the darkness fear before all things the messengers of light.” – The Way of Simplicity. v. 39-42. As servants of the Holy Daughter, we pledge to carry Her light into all places of the world, and often we are mocked or scalded for it. Our Lady has promised that all souls will eventually be redeemed and saved; we are not to be disheartened by a soul who seems unwilling to recognise Her at this present time. Eventually all will turn back to the Mother again.

That is all I have to share today, the verses which stir the most connections I can see between this tradition’s secret gospel and the Filianic Scriptures. There may be more which I haven’t touched upon, while others felt more rooted in Judaism or Christianity. As a perennialist; to me these verses I have shared represent how Our Lady has shown Herself in yet another religion as She has done for centuries in different parts of the world. Magdalene is my favourite reflection of Zoe Sophia, the Holy Daughter, as when I picture Her I see the two as One. My Kyria.

Blessed is Our Saviouress and Her Light Bearers,

Blessed is She.

Glory to the Supernal Rose

Related image

9th of Rosa – Pomedi

Happy Rosalia / Rosa Mundi / High Feast of Roses to all my Filianic sisters!

I had hoped to ready my altar with proper roses for this holiday but we had no deliveries to my shop and I haven’t found time to buy them elsewhere. So I’ve had to make do with carnations, which are pretty and a few of the pink ones are ‘rose like’, though not quite having the same effect. I know that Déa appreciates the effort, as it was She who made them to begin with. I’ve also been too busy today to do the little fire ritual I had planned. My duties as an auntie have to come before my religious practice; something which I also believe Déa approves of, as my dedication and care to my niece reflects Her gentle nurturing of all Her children.

At the very least I have been able to do a few prayers and listened to five books of the Daughter’s teachings (Pillar of Light to the Crystal Tablet in the ECE). For anyone who is interested in downloading the audio version of the Recital, recorded by myself and Sorella Monica, please send me an email via my contact page. I feel the small chapter on Our Mother’s Love is the most befitting on this festival.

“Take heart, My children, take joy and courage in our Mother. For She who created you also loves you, even to the end of the age. Take heart, though you have turned from Her, for She has not forsaken you, neither are Her eyes filled with anger. And Her hands that have shattered the gates of hell shall not harm you; that have broken hell’s foundation shall be lain on you in gentleness. Therefore hide yourself not from Her, and put aside the tangled weeds of thought that strive each with the other. For of all things, love is the simplest.” – On Our Mother’s Love

Any day is a good day to be reminded, when the shadows of this world try to harden our hearts, just how much Mari loves us. This passage always gives me the image of Her as a mother lioness who would rip apart anyone who threatened her cub and also protect and nurture her young so tenderly. We often see the Celestial Mother depicted in images of the Virgin Mary, pure and kind and gentle, as truly She is. But She is also fierce and passionate, even somewhat terrifying, in what She will do to save us. From crushing the ‘snake’ that tempted the first daughter and brought about the chasm of kear, to separating Herself in the form of Her Daughter in order to be closer to us, then shattering the gates of Hell and making the demons within scatter as She went forth to rescue Her beloved Zoe Anna; and in doing so, rescuing all Her children.

Fire is the element of Agyia Vicka, Jana of Courage and Valour. Today we light candles and bonfires to celebrate the fierce determination of Our Mother, who is not just our creator and nourisher, but also our protector from the creatures of darkness. It is Her Light that makes the keres and archons scutter away in terror before they, too, seek the redemption of Heaven and the forgiveness of Déa.

“For those who shelter in the darkness fear, above all things, the Messengers of Light.”Way of Simplicity v.42 

Meanwhile the Rose is the symbol of both the Mother and the Daughter. Our Lady Zoe is truly the Rose of the World (Rosa Mundi) while Mother Mari is the Rose of Heaven (Rosa Caeli). The innermost temple in the heart of Maids is also described in the scriptures as taking the form of a rose. It is no mystery why so many of the Disney fairytales I watched, both with my niece and growing up myself, have reoccurring images of roses. Both Snow White and Sleeping Beauty are described as having ‘lips as red as the rose’, the latter also being renamed ‘Briar Rose’ while in exile. The salvation of the Prince in Beauty and the Beast is also connected to magical rose. The image of our Heavenly Princess has radiated throughout history in fairy tales of maidens and princesses overcoming evil with their pure, loving hearts as well as their bravery.

My matron Hera, Agyia Magdalene, is also heavily connected to rose imagery. She is often depicted either with red hair or a red cloak or holding her legendary red egg. There is a connection drawn in the, albeit most definitely fictional, Da Vinci Code between Magdalene’s legacy and the ‘Rose Line’ / ‘Rosslyn’. This inspired me to take my faith name as Roselyn. All of Magdalene’s legends, both orthodox and esoteric combined, give an image of Her as both the Holy Daughter and also a Holy Mother Herself, bearing a daughter ‘Sarah’ (meaning Princess) according to some. Whether or not these are historically accurate holds little bearing for me, the legends and tales themselves are more examples of the Heavenly Mother and Holy Daughter’s cyclical mythos. Magdalene was a holy woman who, according to Sophian Gnostics, experienced the sufferings of the world before ascending up from the darkness into the Her liberation. It also believed by some that She became the daughter the Virgin Mary never had, whether through marriage  to her son or simply a close meeting of kindred spirits. Together they form an interesting avatar of the Mother and Daughter.

Be sure to take a moment today to meditate on the verse of Our Mother’s Love and be assured of Her devotion to you. In Her eyes, we are all princesses (or prince, if you fancy) of Heaven; our true home. Rosalia is about remembering that our Assumption into Her arms is guaranteed and without condition – it just may take longer to cross that bride of kear depending on our path. No matter what; She loves us.

She loves you.

Blessed is Mum.


Here Cometh The Lady

See Her riding on the stardust,
Hear the Angels proclaim Her arrival,
The Daughter of Light,
The Lady of the Fiery Rose,
Our Saviour and Redeemer,
She has come.
Cross the great chasm of illusion,
Through the dense fog of folly,
Her flame becons us home.
O Princess Divine,
O Mistress of the Dawn,
She whose love has flooded Hell itself,
She who has turned none from Her grace.
For centuries they have denied Her,
For aeons She has been degraded and forgotten,
And yet where is Her anger?
Where is Her wrath?
All She has for Her nay-sayers,
Is a hand stretched out in compassion,
And an invitation for redemption.
Most humble is the Heavenly Maid,
Blessed is the Child of Sophia,
Blessed is Our Kyria;
Zoe Anna.


Visions of Avala

22nd of Flora – Stelladi

Today I took a rather longer than usual walk with my dogs, seeing as the weather was so beautiful. I’m fortunate enough to have some lovely open Essex fields and woods around where I live. I could lose myself for hours just walking across them and sometimes not come across another human soul (unless its another dog walker or jogger). Honestly I do more praying when I’m out walking than I do at home, as it’s actually easier to be by myself when I’m out on a walk. My dogs are much less judgemental about my spiritual practice than humans are.

This morning I took a detour through a small wood and came across this little seating area where a tree had fallen, making a surprisingly comfortable bench. I sat there for a while in quiet meditation, listening to the bird song, reciting a couple of Psalms.

After leaving the woods, I came to another field that had a rather large hill. I always have this strange compulsion, in both video games and in real life, to go to the top of any hill or mountain where I can appreciate the view. There were quite a few nettles and prickly leaves surrounding the hill but I endured the slight stings to get to the top and, again, just sit and take in how gorgeous this world is.

While I sat there, I did attempt to record more audio versions of Déanic scriptures, these ones being a collection of Psalms compiled by Glenn King. This is to go with audio versions I have recorded of the Clear Recital and the Janite Psalms, both of which are complete (though may be re-recorded for improvement at a later date). Anyone wishing to have a free copy of these, please do let me know. However as I tried to read aloud Glenn’s psalms, my labradoodle decided to start playing hide and seek, and I didn’t think it would be very pleasant if my reading of scriptures was combined with me shouting for my wayward pup. So I hope to do those at a later date. The audio formats are not for anything official or to be sold; I just personally enjoy listening to scripture as much as reading it. Even as a child I preferred audio books, while still appreciating the written word (this may be due to my many sight problems growing up).

Listening to the scriptures while gazing out at our sister, the Earth, always fills me with such a glowing warmth. I feel like I’m gazing out a glimpse of Avala, or to the Perfect World which existed before the ‘fall’, and the illusion of matter.

Yet the true self also loves this earth; but loves it for that it is an image of the Divine. For the world is as a crazed and spotted mirror, reflecting the perfect country of Eternity. – The Three Loves (v. 5-6)

It is easy to see a flower, or the clear sky, or a smiling child as an image of Déa. One of my daily struggles is to also remember to see Her in what is not always so obvious. Or hidden by the kear of my own soul. For instance, seeing Her in the face of a customer at work who is rude or frustrating. Or seeing Her in a politician who is poisoning the world. It’s sometimes difficult to remember that, even in the most vile and hateful of people, there is a spark of Sophia within them, crying out to be freed. And She loves all Her children equally; it is merely our own kear that defines the distance between souls and Déa. Even myself I sometimes have to remind, when I have moments of depression or self-loathing, I try to remember that I am a reflection of Her. And even so, the scriptures remind us, that we are not our bodies or our minds, as both part from us eventually.


Blessed is Our Lady,

Blessed is She.


Zoe’s Pride

Image result for goddess pride

Pride Month has begun. We are also coming up to Rosalia: the Feast of Assumpta in the Janite Calendar (known as Rosa Mundi in the Orthodox calendar). Rosalia takes place on the Summer Solstice, when the sun is at the highest point in the sky. As the sun is a symbol of Our Heavenly Mother, we praise Her and how Her tears revive and assume all of her children into Heaven along with Our Saviour; Zoe Sophia.

As a Christian I had to wrestle constantly with coming to terms with my sexuality as well as my faith. On the one hand the Bible seemed to clear in its forbidding of same-sex relationships, both in Leviticus and the writings of Paul. And Evangalists are always very vocal, to say the least, in reminding us of this. However, the internet led me to many different ways to view the Bible and to read from LGBT Christian apologists who explained the various interpretations one could read into these passages. Now there are denominations who approve of and even sanctify same-sex marriages. The Church of England in which I was raised blesses gay and lesbian civil partnerships, but not in the ‘sacrament of marriage’. While I have not been a Christian, let alone orthodox, for many many years, I do admire and support the struggle of LGBT members of the church fighting to change its stance and give LGBT people equal rights and respect.

Even as a Gnostic Christian, I was still left rather disillusioned. Sure, most neo-Gnostic churches and groups support and affirm same-sex relations, but their theological language is still mostly steeped in heteronormativity. Almost as if the only way the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine can be held as equal is if compared to a heterosexual relationship. Man and wife. Father and Mother. The Lord and his Bride etc. The Sophian Gnostic ‘secret gospel’ of Mary Magdalene written by Tau Malachi speaks of how twin souls must meet in ‘male and female’ bodies in order to be made whole. I’ve also seen many mentions how the “love play between a man and woman echoes the love of the divine mother and father.” Statements such as this, even if merely metaphorical, give the impression that same-sex relationships don’t hold the same spiritual meaning as do those of hetero couples. This is also a common problem in a lot of modern Paganism, I found, specifically in Wicca where the focus on the Goddess and God as lovers is also compared to a sexual relationship that unites the two in ‘perfect balance’.

I’m a lesbian. I’m a woman who is attracted to other women. I don’t consider myself ‘butch’ nor ‘femme’; I am who I am. Some days I like to wear pink tops or dresses while other days I wear sporty clothes – this doesn’t affect my being a woman. And I’ve found myself attracted to many different types of women as well. I’m not a ‘feminine’ who needs to unite with a ‘masculine’ to be made complete, nor vise versa. And as a Filianist, obviously, I do not believe that Déa needs a Deus to complete Her. She is whole in and of Herself. She conceived Her Daughter by Her own magnificent grace. We as Maids are not made complete merely by a sexual relationship to another. The only union that completes our journey is by uniting with Déa Herself. It is by our turned human souls embracing and being one with our Kyria, Zoe.

But love is important. Love binds us together in one body to help bring all souls unto Déa so that we can be saved. True Love, something we often hear and read about in fairy tales between a knight and a princess or some variant thereof, is not limited to a man and woman. True Love may involve a sexual union but is, in truth, a force in itself separate from lust or physical desire. Love forms between two women. Love forms between two men. True Love is formed between a parent and child, just as Our Lady was risen up by the loving embrace of Her Mother and made whole again. True Love happens between friends or siblings. True Love is in putting all your energy and efforts into a righteous cause for others; just as Our Lady proved Her love for all of us by descending into the darkest depths and shattering Her Soul for us.

There is nothing in the Recital which condones or condemns intimate relationships, except one of which I am aware, and is all that needs to be said:

“Yet those whose union is an expression of the love of souls shall be counted chaste in My name for the sake of that love.” – the Way of Simplicity (v. 13)

Déa approves and blesses all unions, regardless of gender or sexuality, so long as it is a true expression of the love of souls. The love of souls has to be equal in respect and consent on both parts for it to be a true expression of love – I feel the whole message of the Recital carries this implication. One can debate and discourse until the end of days what sort of relationships this might imply but we must always come back to the core message of the scripture.

I do still pray to one day meet the woman of my dreams who I might share a deep and intimate connection with, in a union that helps lift up my soul to the light of Déa in ecstasy. But until that day comes, and even after, my heart and soul belongs to Déa, who made my spirit Perfect in Her image.

Blessed is She.

I’ll leave this post with an updated photo of my altar, as this week I have placed a beautiful set of roses as my offering to Déa, reminding me of the shape of the temple of my heart and how my Lady Zoe is the fiery rose of heaven.