Zoe’s Pride

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Pride Month has begun. We are also coming up to Rosalia: the Feast of Assumpta in the Janite Calendar (known as Rosa Mundi in the Orthodox calendar). Rosalia takes place on the Summer Solstice, when the sun is at the highest point in the sky. As the sun is a symbol of Our Heavenly Mother, we praise Her and how Her tears revive and assume all of her children into Heaven along with Our Saviour; Zoe Sophia.

As a Christian I had to wrestle constantly with coming to terms with my sexuality as well as my faith. On the one hand the Bible seemed to clear in its forbidding of same-sex relationships, both in Leviticus and the writings of Paul. And Evangalists are always very vocal, to say the least, in reminding us of this. However, the internet led me to many different ways to view the Bible and to read from LGBT Christian apologists who explained the various interpretations one could read into these passages. Now there are denominations who approve of and even sanctify same-sex marriages. The Church of England in which I was raised blesses gay and lesbian civil partnerships, but not in the ‘sacrament of marriage’. While I have not been a Christian, let alone orthodox, for many many years, I do admire and support the struggle of LGBT members of the church fighting to change its stance and give LGBT people equal rights and respect.

Even as a Gnostic Christian, I was still left rather disillusioned. Sure, most neo-Gnostic churches and groups support and affirm same-sex relations, but their theological language is still mostly steeped in heteronormativity. Almost as if the only way the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine can be held as equal is if compared to a heterosexual relationship. Man and wife. Father and Mother. The Lord and his Bride etc. The Sophian Gnostic ‘secret gospel’ of Mary Magdalene written by Tau Malachi speaks of how twin souls must meet in ‘male and female’ bodies in order to be made whole. I’ve also seen many mentions how the “love play between a man and woman echoes the love of the divine mother and father.” Statements such as this, even if merely metaphorical, give the impression that same-sex relationships don’t hold the same spiritual meaning as do those of hetero couples. This is also a common problem in a lot of modern Paganism, I found, specifically in Wicca where the focus on the Goddess and God as lovers is also compared to a sexual relationship that unites the two in ‘perfect balance’.

I’m a lesbian. I’m a woman who is attracted to other women. I don’t consider myself ‘butch’ nor ‘femme’; I am who I am. Some days I like to wear pink tops or dresses while other days I wear sporty clothes – this doesn’t affect my being a woman. And I’ve found myself attracted to many different types of women as well. I’m not a ‘feminine’ who needs to unite with a ‘masculine’ to be made complete, nor vise versa. And as a Filianist, obviously, I do not believe that Déa needs a Deus to complete Her. She is whole in and of Herself. She conceived Her Daughter by Her own magnificent grace. We as Maids are not made complete merely by a sexual relationship to another. The only union that completes our journey is by uniting with Déa Herself. It is by our turned human souls embracing and being one with our Kyria, Zoe.

But love is important. Love binds us together in one body to help bring all souls unto Déa so that we can be saved. True Love, something we often hear and read about in fairy tales between a knight and a princess or some variant thereof, is not limited to a man and woman. True Love may involve a sexual union but is, in truth, a force in itself separate from lust or physical desire. Love forms between two women. Love forms between two men. True Love is formed between a parent and child, just as Our Lady was risen up by the loving embrace of Her Mother and made whole again. True Love happens between friends or siblings. True Love is in putting all your energy and efforts into a righteous cause for others; just as Our Lady proved Her love for all of us by descending into the darkest depths and shattering Her Soul for us.

There is nothing in the Recital which condones or condemns intimate relationships, except one of which I am aware, and is all that needs to be said:

“Yet those whose union is an expression of the love of souls shall be counted chaste in My name for the sake of that love.” – the Way of Simplicity (v. 13)

Déa approves and blesses all unions, regardless of gender or sexuality, so long as it is a true expression of the love of souls. The love of souls has to be equal in respect and consent on both parts for it to be a true expression of love – I feel the whole message of the Recital carries this implication. One can debate and discourse until the end of days what sort of relationships this might imply but we must always come back to the core message of the scripture.

I do still pray to one day meet the woman of my dreams who I might share a deep and intimate connection with, in a union that helps lift up my soul to the light of Déa in ecstasy. But until that day comes, and even after, my heart and soul belongs to Déa, who made my spirit Perfect in Her image.

Blessed is She.

I’ll leave this post with an updated photo of my altar, as this week I have placed a beautiful set of roses as my offering to Déa, reminding me of the shape of the temple of my heart and how my Lady Zoe is the fiery rose of heaven.




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